Tuesday, 4 May 2010
A Problem shared makes two...........
Problem One: How to cope without an iPhone.
Solution: impossible! Turn off access to wi-fi, cry a bit and then use it anyway - hang the eventual costs
Problem Two: How to explain that the toilet is broken in your room without the iPhone app translator being available.
Solution: first try the well tested british solution of speaking loudly with mime accompaniment. Resist temptation to get technical as to why the toilet is broken (ie flush not working), respond quickly to recipient´s non verbal cues and just say " the toilet is broken". Problem solved
Problem Three: First "ethical" dilemma. Do you let friend and trusted colleague sleep on the plane even though you realise that their head is disappearing over the edge of the seat into aisle OR wake up said friend to avoid problems later?
Solution:Do not leave them to sleep. This results in said friend waking up without the use of their neck and fleetingly believing that they had experienced an inflight spinal cord injury.
Problem Four: How to lift head up when neck not working
Solution: Using two hands for about 10 minutes to prop head up.
Problem Five: How to work out currrency using the exchange rate 685 pesos= one pound with no maths skills and no access to iPhone app.
Solution: Guess - hang the costs - again
Problem Six: How to eat when cash brought with you runs out and ATM machines will not acecpt the three cards you brought with you
Solution: Suck teeth, try not to panic, eye contact imploring each other to miraculously solve problem, ring Dan Johnson, sit in foyer of hotel like waifs and strays, walk around the city trying every ATM to be found. Jump and shout joyously when one finally works '"hurrah can eat tonight!"
Problem Seven: How to live through the days with no suitcase, no clothes, no necessities and no gadgets except for one mac rapidly running out of charge with lead in said case
Solution: celebrate that friend is same size and packs for an army, ask facebook friends for loan of gadgets, ask at regular intervals at reception if case has arrived - believing secretly that it is some great conspiracy. Then sit back and think of the compensation.
More to follow I am sure as the days progress.................